Ask Amy: His kid is about to ruin our marriage plans

DEAR AMY: I’ve been with my partner for four years. We lived together for two years until his job took him six hours away. We have been maintaining our relationship, long distance.

Columnist Amy Dickinson (Bill Hogan/Chicago Tribune)

Our plan has always been for him to move this summer in order to be with me in my career following school. Marriage has been a topic of conversation for several years. In his “ideal world, we would already be married.”

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He was on board with our plan to reunite until two weeks before my first day at work. Now, he is hesitant, and possibly not going to move with me for several reasons: his son lives nearby him, and also every time he moves in his career, he has to start over at the bottom.

We talked openly about my job locations and how far away from his son he was willing to live. We decided on an eight-hour distance. My new job is just under eight hours, but now he feels it is too far away.

Amy, he promised and convinced me that he would move when the time came. Although I understand his situation, I feel betrayed.

Two years of long distance has been extremely difficult, and we always looked at this move as the light at the end of the tunnel.

My job is very specialized and would be difficult to maintain in his location.

I want to continue moving forward in our relationship, but I’m scared there may be no future now.


DEAR SCARED: Nothing interferes with our “ideal worlds” quite like children do. Because, once you take on the role of a parent, your child becomes an

Source:: The Mercury News – Lifestyle


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