As a girl, Lena Dunham always saw herself as one day becoming a mother.
In fact, the former “Girls” star revealed in a new essay for Vogue that her childhood fantasy about being a mother extended to one day being pregnant. She said she would stuff her shirt “with a pile of hot laundry” and march around her family’s living room “beaming.” She also reveled in the “innate power of “pregnancy when wearing a prosthetic belly for “Girls,” when her character Hannah Horvath was pregant.
But Dunham has revealed in her essay that this fantasy of growing a baby inside her will never become a reality. That’s because, at 31, she decided to have a total hysterectomy. She said she made this difficult choice following a decade of suffering persistent and sometimes agonizing pain and complex surgeries due to endometriosis.
Dunham has been open in the past about suffering from endometriosis, in which the tissue that normally lines the inside of the uterus — the endometrium — grows outside the uterus, according to the Mayo Clinic.
In her Vogue essay, she said the pain became “unbearable” in August. When various conventional and alternative therapies didn’t bring relief by November, she decided it was time to have her uterus removed.
“With pain like this, I will never be able to be anyone’s mother,” she wrote. “Even if I could get pregnant, there’s nothing I can offer.”
The surgery involved removing both her cervix and uterus, she wrote. After the surgery, her doctors revealed that her uterus was “worse” than anyone could have imagined.
While Dunham wrote that, physically, she recovered “like a champ,” she also described her emotional roller-coaster. Dunham said that she received support from her longtime boyfriend, Bleachers frontman Jack Antonoff, 33. Dunham and Antonoff revealed in January that they had broken up after five years together, Page Six reported.
Dunham also wrote that she was surprised she wasn’t bitter or resentful about her many friends who are becoming pregnant or having children. She added that said her doctors would soon explore whether her ovaries contain eggs that she could presumably have fertilized and then be carried by a surrogate.
She wrote that she consoles herself with the belief that she has “choices,” which include adoption. She said she didn’t feel that she had these choices when she was coping with the uncertainty that comes with endometriosis.
Then again, she wrote in Vogue that …
Source:: East Bay – Entertainment